Tag Archives: self help

Self-Care in Terrifying Times

Unless you have been on a beach somewhere, disconnected from all sources of media, you will be aware of the horrifying acts of terrorism that befell the people and city of Paris on November 13th, 2015.

In the days since the horror, you have possibly watched news reports, read articles and possibly a variety of other media going over the gory details of the attack itself. You may find yourself discussing the life and motivation of the terrorists themselves, and reading stories from the survivors and loved ones of the victims. Continue reading

8 things that look like depression (but aren’t)

Have you ever felt down and miserable, despite the fact that life in general is great?  What about bursts of anxiety so intense they leave you gasping, but you’re not actually worried about anything (or at least nothing that you think would reasonably result in a panic attack)? If you can relate Continue reading

Do you know what you need to be happier?

It’s always nice to hear from a previous client.

As therapists, we have a privileged opportunity to share a precious part of our clients’ journey through pain, crisis, vulnerability – but we usually do not get to hear about the “what happened next?”. Often, after the work is ‘done’, our minds wander back to our clients and we can only hope that things are going well.  Hope that our relationship however brief, had some positive influence, that they are happier now. Continue reading

50 Shades: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Valentine’s Day.  A day to celebrate our love for those dearest to us.  A time to make gestures – big and small – that show how much we care.

And in 2015, it will also be known as the weekend when ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ hit theaters.

#sigh. Continue reading

Emotional Detox: can one size fit all?

Both of us are firm believers that commercialized ‘detoxing’ is at the best a ‘fad’, at worst potentially dangerous. Psychologically speaking, it also appears to somehow minimize or trivialize the actual medical detox that patients need to work through in an addiction program.

We do not support (nor does the research) drastic lifestyle changes. That ranges from drastic changes in our diets to drastic changes in our relationships. Research and experience tells us that these types of changes are just not sustainable, and often do more harm than good.

Having said that, most people who choose to undertake a detox do so for valid reasons. Somehow, they know that they are just not feeling rightContinue reading

If you’re down, don’t get up (just yet): 5 Tips to help you heal

We know this might seem odd – controversial even – but we believe that it’s not always in our best interest to get up and dust ourselves off the moment we’ve had a setback.

Let us explain.

Of course, we agree it is important to develop a sense of ‘I can do this!’ (resilience) in the face of challenges.  However, Continue reading

Got the January blues? 6 Tips to get you back on track

Some of us are not blue. Nope! Some of us are just delighted that the holidays are over, the pressure is off, the tree is down, the electricity bill isn’t straining with the weight of cute but unnecessary lights, the gifts are unwrapped (lost, broken?), sleeping times back to normal, and routine and normality (whatever that is..) has resumed. Almost. Kind of… Continue reading

‘Self-care’ is not ‘Selfish’! Holiday Sanity Tips part 3

Today’s focus: Self-Care

They say that Christmas is a time for giving. But when did you last give to yourself? Not just a material gift, but time, fun, nurturing things? We often forget about ourselves and fret instead about the people we love. Are we not allowed to love ourselves? Continue reading

Holidays Shmolidays: Fed Up Yet?

Stressing out over the Holidays?

Well you’re not alone! There really is a frenzied feeling out there and it’s real easy to get caught up in it. People are rushing around, bumping into each other, glaring, frowning, clenching jaws, panicking. The atmosphere in shops/stores is almost predatorial! If you’re not careful you’ll lose that warm festive (or Christmassy) feeling they all sing about and quickly develop a hatred for your fellow man.. (you know, that person who’s not making eye contact and just parked their giant car in the space you spotted before they did.   Continue reading

Saying No: the cornerstone of healthy boundaries

At some point or other in therapy with just about every client, the topic of healthy boundaries comes up. Most of us struggle to a greater or lesser degree with knowing how to separate the ‘me’ from the ‘we’. As a result, we find ourselves exhausted, confused and/or overwhelmed by one or more of our relationships. Ann Lamott sums up the literature on boundaries in a beautiful, simple but powerful statement: Continue reading